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2004-06-05 - 4:10 p.m.

Stuff I really want to write about & totally will soon:

Slayage conference, Lambda Literary Awards, Book Expo.

There is part of my job that happens pretty infrequently, enough so that each time it's really terrible & I forget everything I learned last time it happened. We get phone calls from women who think we are a rape crisis center, or a shelter, or they know we are a bookstore but they know nowhere else to turn for help. It's so fucking hard & I have no training & today this girl was 18, & her mom's boyfriend has been beating her family & getting on top of her & her brother for like 10 years. I gave her numbers & she called back because they were all disconnected. I found her another one (use Chicago Abused Women's Coalition - I have had luck with them a few times) and she called back & sounded so much better. She's going to college in August & wanted to stick it out in that house but just couldn't go another day. It's hard to go on with my day after shit like this. There's an article on the local free paper this week about our indie feminist bookstore vs. Borders. In it, our store's owners say how when they first opened 25 years ago, their hope had been that in like 5 years there would be no need for a feminist bookstore because mainstream places would've stopped ignoring feminist & queer writers. Ok - even if they ever ever did that, what if you called Borders with your rape? We need more more more resources of all kinds for women, & the ones that do exist need so much more $. Also I have thought about getting training & doing some kind of rape or abuse counseling but I cannot imagine hearing that all day long. I guess you do it anyway, because you can't imagine someone not being there to hear it? It makes me want to shoot some guns at some peoples' mothers' boyfriends. And watch some Buffy, too, for sure.

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