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2003-05-15 - 9:54 a.m.

There were hundreds of people in line for James Marsters, I can�t imagine how many autographs he ultimately signed. We were supposed to give him our thing to be signed (body parts expressly forbidden), say Hi Mr. Marsters but �no life stories.� God. So, we got up close & he was just amazing. I heard him taking compliments from everyone like it was the first time he�d heard them & saying �I feel so wrong taking compliments, it�s really the writing. They give me gold every week.� I got in front of him & gave him the trading card of bloody badass Spike & he got all excited & said �I look good! I look really bad, & it looks good!� and I said �Thanks for being on a feminist show.� Oh my god, you guys. He slowly, like it took an HOUR, raised his eyes to mine, & there was all this light shining out of them into my brain & heart, & he said �THANK you.� Then I said how lots of cool women feel less crazy & isolated because of the work he does & it seemed to mean a great deal to him. Tish confirmed that she was watching his face & he was clearly moved, it was not any wishfulness on my part. I left & he chased after me. Ok, no. I left & walked outside & relived the moment with all the ladies & my contact fell out & I freaked out & forgot the entire layout of the place where we�d spent all weekend. Since then, I don�t think I LOOK changed, but I am definitely different inside. COOLER & HOTTER & everything else. Also, Tish told him it�s really cool he does fan events & he said he loves it, he gets locked into doing the show & going home & it�s great to actually get out & meet people. COOL. Ok also we saw his band Ghost of the Robot play. I have definitely pretended much worse bands are good because I was fucking somebody in the band, so that won�t be a problem once we are totally dating.

He was super cool in the Q&A session. His thoughts on his character were extremely complex, thorough, & political. He talked about the rape scene. One of the worst days of his life, but he felt it had to happen because they were too close to sending a message that dangerous guys are great for dating. He said �I usually hate watching movies or shows with assault scenes like that. I have a very visceral reaction; I want to beat up the guy who acted it, the guy who wrote it, & the guy who directed it.� He went on about Spike appearing too much like a dream boyfriend, & said �If a guy is mean to people, he�s going to be mean to his girl.� And he said �You aren�t going to find the cool bad guy who treats you like a princess.� And that Spike was too close to that, it was irresponsible & made him increasingly uncomfortable, & he felt it was in opposition to the central morality of the show.

He was asked who are his favorite actors to play a scene with, & as people on the set. First he said Amber is great to be onset with, & Sarah was a good challenge to play a scene with. He is all Method-y as an actor, & she�s extremely off/on. She�d make fun of his Method-ness & say �Ooh, I�m an actor. Now I�m a tree.� Then he stopped himself & said �Wait. Erase all that. Juliet on both accounts.� LOVE IT!!!! He went on about how she�s the same sort of actor he is, & his scenes with her brought out something in Spike that you can see onscreen with her but with no one else, & how they were flirting with getting fired by being so super dirty. He said to watch her hands. Dirty! I�m so happy to hear this, much more believable than SMG as his fave actor. He said Emma Caulfield is super right wing & he�s a liberal � �NOT a bleeding heart, but a kill �em liberal.� H.O.T. That�s called a radical. Once I am more in his life, I�ll get him comfortable using the word. Anyway, they argued daily onset but then when they had to do the sex scene he liked her more.

When he found out he�d be doing love scenes with Sarah, it freaked him out. He said she was extremely sisterly to him, �someone who you love, who drives you crazy sometimes, but you love, like a sister.� It was a challenge to think of her in a lusty way, so he tried all this different stuff. �I tried staying in character between takes, just sitting & watching her.� He tried all this different stuff & just couldn�t get it, �she�s attractive & all, but still was just like a sister.� Finally, �it was the chicken hat. Buffy had just saved the world, come back from the dead, & here she is working fast food in a chicken hat. And not complaining about it. That did it for me.�

He also said he�s dated all different kinds of women but none of them treated him like a human being? So he stopped dating for a while because he realized he�s fucked up & picked mean women to be attracted to.

Ok, Tom Lenk & Danny Strong were both really funny. They & Adam Busch live within a few blocks of each other. What if you were walking around there & saw the entire Troika coming at you? It could so happen. Tom is whinier & more funny. Danny is a deluxe ham and cheese. It is too much. Someone asked if he�d ever been mobbed on the street & he laughed a lot & was like �Yeah! I cannot leave my apartment! So many ladies!� Nina says he shouldn�t joke & that it�s completely a possibility for us to set up camp outside his place. Also Danny Strong�s first job connected to Tha Biz was running lines with Charlotte Rae. He said she told him �I�m just an old whore. They call & I come running.� Um. No? The woman in front of us clapped so hard when the name Charlotte Rae was mentioned I thought her hands would break. Tom Lenk talked about becoming obsessed with this site that was teen girls saying if he was cute or not. He said at first they all were saying �He�s so cute. I wish he went to my school.� Then it turned into �This guy looks like he got run over by a train.� He said he ended up printing 5 pages of the most hysterical ones & reading them at an open mic comedy night. Also he has done fancy things like written plays that have been performed.

Kennedy was there. She had on cute pink pants & said her family doesn�t support her in what she does but she doesn�t ask them for anything so whatever. I loved that. She seemed straight, but loves doing the sex scenes with Aly. The show made her realize she loves fighting & it�s something she wants to look for in more roles!

Sydney made fast friends with Scott Schwartz. He is a stuntman who�s fought both Buffy & Angel, & is going to be in the new Starsky & Hutch, & in Crow 4 with Boreanaz. He comes from a pro wrestling background into stuntwork, & he loves to watch Cops because he �likes to see bad guys get beat down� & America�s Most Wanted �so I can make sure I�m not on it heh heh heh.�

Also The Master was there, Mark Metcalf. I had his sign my Master action figure. He has a restaurant in Milwaukee & is rather debonair. I�d do him.

George Hertzwhatever who played Adam was also there. I could not stand him. I hated Adam & thought he was a black hole sucking interestingness out of everyone around him. The actor is an ass who wouldn�t get off the stage for his Q&A, effectively taking away time that belonged to Danny, Tom & MARSTERS. GOD. He was one of those terrible �funny� guys who someone has to ask �HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT DOING STANDUP?� Good lord. Don�t encourage such retardation. He made jokes about taking off his pants.

James Marsters� posture is incredible. It�s like his entire body is a weapon. Legs are far apart, crotch forward, hands rubbing thighs a lot. He should give classes in badass. OH! Also interesting � he was totally opposed to William the Poet � he didn�t want to play Spike as a wuss at all, was really angry with Joss & begged him to not make him act that way. You see, James was awkward in high school & didn�t want to go back to that & have everyone see that part of him. He is perfect, right?

I can�t think of more but I will later. Oh, these 2 sisters were dressed like Dark Willow & Dopplegangland Willow! They made their costumes & they both looked so incredible. I loved those ladies.

I have to mention Jason Priestley�s eyes on the 90210 reunion show. Have you seen people wearing MAC LipGlass Lip Gloss? It is like the thickest, shiniest lipgloss ever & I swear to god he must have applied it directly to his eyeballs! Did you see? Plus he mentioned that Brandon was �in many ways the social conscience of America,� but then failed to mention these �ways.� Ian started crying like a big, lobster red, lemonhaired, baby.

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