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2001-05-24 - 4:08 p.m.

This morning I started reading The Vadge Monologues. I wonder if I should read them aloud on the train in the mornings. Dudes seem to like to talk at a volume that is much like a reading-aloud-to-the-train volume. Wouldn't you rather hear me shouting on about vadge stories, than hear some stupid DudeTalk? Is DudeTalk worse when it's 2 Dudes going back & forth, or worse when it's a Dude on a cellphone? Both are so loud.

I don't ever watch "Friends", except maybe once a year or so, & the other day I saw most of this episode that had Bruce Willis on it. He was a love interest for Aniston. I started thinking about how he's not hot but she & the studio audience seem to be all playing this game that's called Pretending Willis is Very Very Hot, & then I remembered that a while ago they played that game about Pretending Magnum P.I. Is Very Very Hot! Right? Didn't he go out with the darkhaired skeleton on that show? Why do they get these old gross guys to go on & be their boyfriends? Probably a lot of other people watch "Friends" & right now are like SHUT UP, how I would be if someone tried to come in on Buffy or Nikita after like 2 eps & have some big complaint. Whatever. None of those people ever seem funny, except Lisa Kudrow.

I cannot BELIEVE that my co-worker left for the day & locked the drawer with all his chocolate in it. The surge of anger I felt as I heard the elevator safely descend with him in it, then raced to that drawer only to have it completely not budge? It's the same surge of anger as when ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

I don't know. I just thought about it for like 5 minutes trying to place the feeling. I think maybe it's the same surge of anger as when my boss has something stuck in his throat & he won't quit clearing it violently & then he stops for like a minute & I think it's over & then he does it again HRRRMGGGRRRRRNNNN.

Sorry. That's too much work talk all at once.

Here is my new thing that I whisper in Lloyd's dirtygirl kitten ear when she's curled up sleeping on the box in my closet (which is always):

Hide your rabbit. I'm gonna grabbit. Better hide your rabbit. I will grabbit. Lloyd...hide your rabbit. Lloyd...gonna grabbit. HIDE YOUR RABBIT GONNA GRABBIT HIDE YOUR RABBIT GONNA GRABBIT HIDE YOUR RABBIT GONNA GRAB GRAB GRAB GRAB GRAB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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