2003-10-30 - 12:29 p.m.

I found out that they really do have stuff where they're like "Mmm...let's keep this couples only." They do! They totally do. Someone told me yesterday how they were going to "keep" Thanksgiv couples only, but then "opened it up" because of this one guy they know who is not in a couple & yet they like him. Eew. Couples are so gross! They just want to hang out around other couples so they can bicker & hate their partners openly! And sit & stand around in unnatural positions just so they can rest a hand on one another's thigh or an arm around the shoulder! And forbid each other to do stuff that they enjoy doing & pick lint of one another's clothes like monkeys! And swap!

My hairdresser looked at the picture I brought & said "So, that's like a mullet." I was like yeah & then a couple minutes later after she washed my hair & was looking at it again she was like "That's not really a mullet. That's....even better than a mullet!" And said how hard it would be for me to maintain a mullet how I'd want it, but that this was just far enough away from one to make me the awesomest of all.

I forgot one thing about Apple Holler. On the way there, all of a sudden Sydney started emergency-shrieking "OH MY GOD! YOU GUYS! YOU GUYS! IT'S A CLOWN!" We totally passed this clown driving a car & we kept passing it & it would pass us. If you asked me what I'd do in that sitch, I would've told you I'd roll my eyes & be like "God. Gross." But we all got so worked up & I couldn't look & I couldn't not look & it made all of us shriek so loudly. It was a total emergency. The license plate said Clown Rd 2. They thought that meant road, but I'm pretty sure it meant rod. We decided it was a woman because the hands were so small on the steering wheel & I said "It could be a tiny man with effeminate hands" & Sydney was like "YOU THINK THEY'RE TINY FAKE HANDS!" Oh my god, that's such a great call, I wish that's what I said. To the nakey eye, they appear to be women's hands...but to the smart & clothed eye....THE CLOWN IS CLEARLY A MAN DRIVING WITH TINY FAKE HANDS.

Guess who got free copies of the new Spike/Angel book AND Tales of the Slayer 3? Just guess. Your Great Old Unca Pam did!

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